Life can change dramatically in thirty seconds, which is about how long it took for us to walk into a conference room, sit down on faux wood and blue-cushioned chairs, and look at the oncology doctor’s sympathetic face as she said, “I know you’ve been waiting all day so I’ll get right to the point. Your son has cancer. It is definitely leukemia. Acute leukemia.”
I don’t remember anything she said after that. I only recall that she was wearing green. And that I covered my face as I sobbed and turned away to wretch into a nearby trash can.
It has mostly been a whirlwind since then, Jeff and I muddling through, like fumbling around for a light switch in the dark. Perhaps you can relate to your little world going off the rails in about thirty seconds or less. An accident happens or you receive news or a diagnosis and suddenly you are bleeding out shock, sorrow, survival and stress. Not necessarily in that order.
If you can’t relate or are not sure if you can, then this hasn’t happened to you. Yet. You may live to be seventy-five before it happens, but I assure you it will.
For those who are thinking, “yeah, I totally get that,” let us not grow weary in sharing our experiences with others. Several friends wrote me and shared details about their own personal experiences that were so very insightful and incredibly helpful to me. Plus, it’s just nice to know you’re not alone.
I continue to write this blog to reiterate, at the risk of being boring and repetitive, to share with you that it IS, in fact, possible to have joy when you’re going through the unimaginable. It IS, in fact, possible to NOT live in fear, even though your circumstances suggest that that is completely illogical.
The peace of Christ transcends all amount of odds and statistics. As we continue to seek His face, the joy we can claim truly defies logic. His insurmountable love overcomes reason and rational.
The only way I’m surviving this trial is, increasingly and without ceasing, to go before my Lord. To God be the glory.
“He has shown you, O man, what is good;
And what does the Lord require of you?
But to do justly,
To love mercy,
And to walk humbly with your God.” Micah 6:8
Grace be with you, my friends.