Justin is struggling with an upset stomach and a sore rash. The only way he can get relief is by sitting in a warm bath. I think I’ve given him at least a dozen baths in the past two days. Justin can’t climb in and out of the tub by himself.
Tonight I am in agony with back pain from lifting him in and out of the bath tub. Jeff and I are worn out from cleaning and laundering soiled carpet, blankets, sheets and clothes.
Today was the one hundredth day of school and Justin’s kindergarten class had a party. He wanted so much to join in the fun.
We were able to attend the party, but Justin was not feeling well enough to participate. I held back tears as the other kids laughed and played games and Justin only sat with his head down on the table.
Last night, as I was tucking him into bed, I noticed his sad eyes. I asked him what he was thinking about. He said, “I’m thinking about what will happen tomorrow.” With a smile, I reminded him that we were planning to go to his kindergarten party. “No mommy,” he said, “I’m thinking about being sick tomorrow.”
Justin is already beginning to understand that he will not be able to enjoy normal activities like the other kids in his class. Feeling sick is his new normal and he expects it.
I really hate that. I really hate cancer.
I am “hard pressed on every side, but not crushed.” My hope remains steadfast in the Lord and the portion of grace He continues to grant each day.
“But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. 8 We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; 9 persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.” 2 Corinthians 2:7-9
A dear friend came over to pray with me today and another brought a tasty homemade dinner. I also received several encouraging texts and cards. Soon the day will end and my family is safe under His wings and full of lasagna. His grace is enough.
Grace be with you, my friends.