Justin moved from crime scene level bleeding to a cold, mouth sores and an infected toe. Chemotherapy. A necessary evil.

“Mom I just wish I could feel regular again. Like normal and not sick to my stomach everyday.”

“You will, baby, you will.”

“Yeah but it’s so long, mommy. I have a year left, which is 365 days, then a bunch of months, which is a lot MORE days.”

I pull him close. There’s nothing I can say to make this all seem less cruel to a six-year-old.

But this is what I think: just stay ALIVE for me.

On a more positive note, Michael is enjoying parkour camp. (Parkour- the sport of moving along a route, typically in a city, trying to get around or through various obstacles in the quickest and most efficient manner possible, as by jumping, climbing, or running: his amazing parkour skills. Origin of parkour. French.)

He logged in many hours on the monkey bars in preparation for this week. This is all part of Michael’s intensive training to someday appear on American Ninja Warrior.

Today he met one of his Ninja “heroes” who competed in the women’s finals in Las Vegas. If she works out just a little harder, her arms MIGHT someday look as toned as mine. I mean, she can try.

She was super awesome. Michael was all smiles.

This has been good for relieving Michael’s anxiety, and, for that, I am grateful. There are going to be hard times. This is reality. And, yes, when things are difficult, they CAN actually get worse.

But.

There is always grace.