My child is bald and there is chemo in my fridge. Right in the cheese drawer.
This is real. I kept hoping I was stuck in a bad dream and would wake up to “normal” any minute.
Somewhere in between assisting our home care nurse with Justin’s shot and getting groceries today, my eye caught a scripture that I have printed and framed on my desk. Matthew 11:28-30:
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.
So all afternoon this phrase has resonated in my heart. Come to me. Come to me. I don’t have to DO anything or pull myself together or even wash my hair. I just have to believe and trust Jesus enough to go to Him with my problems, my doubts, my pain, my fear and my weariness.
Justin comes to me when he sick or scared or tired. I snapped this picture right before he fell asleep on my lap. I can’t change the situation for him. I can’t take away his cancer. But I can offer him love and comfort. I can offer him rest from his fears with soothing words and open arms.
Jesus DOES have the power to change our difficult circumstances. But sometimes He just doesn’t. But not because he doesn’t feel like helping us. He died on the cross for us for crying out loud! Of course Jesus wants to help us. So if He chooses not to change circumstances to our liking and relief, I must believe that it is for a very GOOD reason. (Romans 8:28)
However, just like I am always there for Justin when he comes to me for consolation, Jesus is always there for us. He resides in scripture and in our hearts (if we are His child). And He can be easily found by reading His word and calling to Him in prayer.
Come with me to Jesus. My body is weary, my mind is distraught, but my soul is at rest. Grace be with you, my friends.
One thought on “Day 157”
God bless you Katie. May God continue to comfort you and give you and your family the love and strength needed to grow through this dark time.
You are right God will provide all that is needed for you to endure to the end. He just wants your trust and love.
Prayers for Justin, you and your family.
Remember the Joy of the Lord is your strength.